My Last To Do List: In Case of Emergencies

As I mentioned in my 2022 recap post, one of the things I completed last year was what I call my last to do list.  Actually it is more of a file with a bunch of documents and a to do list in it, so let's just call it the In Case Of Emergencies (ICOE) file. If you have not read my first post of this series about trust and estate planning, you can read it here. 

This is basically a file that you can tell your emergency contact the location of so if something happens to you, they can go and get it and have a one stop shop of where things are and what they may need to handle for you. This is something that my grandmother had and after she passed away, it was so easy to arrange her affairs, since she had already done most of the work for us. After that, I decided to hone and combine a couple of the lists that I already keep for myself and update my file so that my loved ones would have a roadmap for me. Obviously this changes over time, so I have put it on my yearly purge and organize task list as something I revisit and update once a year. 

Important Docs: I basically have a big thick plastic ziplock bag (like this one) that I keep all of my grab and go important documents in. This includes the lists I will reference below, but it also has things like my trust documents, birth certificate, passport, deed to my house, title for the car etc. I also keep a paper copy of each of my bills so that the account number and phone number to contact are handy. Obviously this could be found online but I like to take the "belt and suspenders" approach. 

Vaccinations! (this can be uploaded online now too)

Other Important Items: This is also not on a list, but I keep any old memory cards or external hard drives with photos etc. in the same bag. I know most things are in the cloud now, but I have a lot of older photos that I have not put in the cloud so those are kept on hard drives for the time being. 

List of bills: This is a printout of an Excel spreadsheet of what bills I have, how they are paid, when they are due, and how much they normally are. Most of my bills are on autopay, so I have also noted whether it comes from my bank account (like the mortgage) or the credit card that I use for autopay. I only use one credit card for anything I have autopay on and use a different card for any online purchases and a third card for brick and mortar purchases. This way if the card that I carry around with me gets lost or stolen, I do not have to go back and update all of my online and/or autopay details. I also have this list saved in a Google drive folder that I share with my emergency contact so that it can be accessed online as well. 

List of bank accounts, retirement accounts etc.: This is also an Excel spreadsheet; I do not put account numbers on this, but it is a list of where the account is, what type it is, and who is the beneficiary. This includes my loan for my mortgage. 

List of properties: the deed or deeds should be in the file anyway, but it could also help to keep a list of the address(es) of any properties in the file too. I have also noted who my mortgage is with and approximately how much I have left on my loan (to be updated once per year). 

List of email address and passwords: this is also up to you and can be stored electronically and shared instead. You can also get a password vault app that can be shared. However, my list is not long; it only includes sites that I think people would want to have access to, such as my Google account, which is where all of my photos and such are. Also this can be retrieved in some cases after your death, although I did read that the Apple iCloud data is not transferrable. To be safe, I would share your login with someone if the information is important! 

Where is this file? Most importantly, tell someone where this file is and how to access it if it is in a safe or somewhere locked. 

Just a side note, as I have mentioned in the past, this file is also the very same one that I would grab if there were a fire heading my way, and because of this, it also has cash in it. I also have a box of photos (hard copies) and a go bag with a change of clothes and some food as part of my emergency prep kit, but if the fire were coming fast, I would just grab the ICOE file and skedaddle. So it satisfies two different purposes. 

Do you have a ICOE file or a Go Bag? Is there anything that I do not have on my list that you have on yours? 

My Last To Do List: Trusts & Other Documents

As I have mentioned before, I have a folder of all of my important docs and a list of all of my accounts and important details. I often call this list "the death list" because it is the list of things to do after I die, but this sounds kinds of morbid, so I will retitle it the last to do list. I hope that this list will not be needed for a long time, but I am happy to keep changing it if that means I live a lot longer. However, I also do feel that it is important to have your affairs in order, just in case. This post is about item one on the last to do list, setting up a trust. 

Before I get started, if you do nothing else or do not feel like reading this long post, at least do these two things: (1) Set up beneficiaries on any retirement accounts or Transfer on Death (TOD) designation on your other accounts. This allows worry free and probate free transfers of your money to someone else and even if you do not have a will or any other paperwork, the money will get into the right hands. (2) Complete an Advance Directive (see below for more info) form which will detail what you want done in case you are incapacitated (i.e. DNR).

But now, let's talk about why any of us would need a trust. A trust will help you to avoid probate. Probate is what happens when you pass away and the court has to approve your will and name or approve your executor. The costs of probate differ by state but in California, costs are based on the gross value of the estate and are 4% on the first $100,000 and then there is a sliding scale after that. Let's just say your assets are worth $100,000. That would be a $4,000 cost!! Also, this process can take six or nine or even twelve months, which can be a pain for your loved ones. 

The alternative is to set up a trust. I always thought that a trust was something rich people had for their spoiled kids. This is not the case! A trust is something that protects you, outlines your wishes and minimizes taxes (and avoids probate!). When you die, your successor trustee (the person you want to carry out your wishes) can start doing what you outline right away without getting the court involved. Depending on your situation, setting up a trust should not be too difficult or costly. I spoke to two different trust attorneys and the going rate is around $1,500 - $2,000 depending on your situation and the number of properties you have (in CA it costs $200 per property to change the name on the title). Of course, you could probably also just Google it and fill out something online that would work, but I wanted the peace of mind that comes with having a professional help me. Plus, my job offers legal benefits, which are similar to health benefits where you pay a little bit month. This costs me about $360 per year, so the attorney fees for setting up a trust only cost me $360. 

Additionally, not only will the attorney help with the trust, but they will also complete an Advance Directive, a will and a Power of Attorney form for you. If you have not already set these up, even if you do not have a trust, you should at least have these three things. 

Why do you need these? Let's talk about each one separately. The Advance Directive conveys your wishes regarding your health in case you become incapacitated and outlines who has the right to make health decisions on your behalf. You can easily get these documents from the internet. Nobody wants a case of Terri Schiavo on their hands. Here is an Advance Directive form that I used in the past. These do vary from state to state so you should use one for your particular state. The other things you should write down and keep with your AD are things like: do you want to be cremated or if you want to be buried, where do you want to be buried, do you have a plot already, etc.?  

We all know what a will is, so I won't go into too much detail; however, you may think that it doesn't matter because everything will just go to your next of kin, which is true. But having a will makes things easier for the people you leave behind, specifically appoints an executor (otherwise the state may do this for you) and can detail who will take care of your children, what your wishes are for your funeral etc. Again, you may think that you won't care because you will be gone, but it will make things easier for whoever is left to take care of your affairs. You can also note anyone you do not want to have anything, like creepy uncle Phil for example. This article is very helpful, and also has a free online version of a will that you can use to get started. 

The Power of Attorney tells people who can make financial decisions on your behalf if something happens to you. We all think we are invincible but what happens if you are in a car accident and can no longer make your own decisions? The other option is to add someone as a joint account holder on your accounts, which will give them the freedom to use the money to pay for your care, pay your bills etc. However, if you don't feel comfortable with that, you should appoint a POA. 

Okay! Let's go back to the trust again. Setting it up does take a little work, i.e. you do have to know who you want to get your stuff, who you want to handle your affairs etc. But once you have decided that, the actual process of doing the paperwork is very easy. For example, I had to give the attorney all of the information about my bank accounts (not numbers, just where the accounts are held), any investment accounts, any properties with addresses and any specific bequests. For who I was going to bequest anything to, all they need is the person's name. No social, no address, no phone. For anyone I wanted to give POA designation to, it was the same. So it was really not as complicated as you may think. 

Also, just like most legalese, there is always a phrase to cover you. For example, very common language goes like this: I gift my 13 inch TV to my brother and if deceased, this gift shall lapse. What does this mean? It means if he is no longer around, the gift goes back into my estate. You can set this up however you want and the "if deceased" can literally be a list of 40 people who you want to have in order of importance, or you can give everything to a charity like Warren Buffet. 

Do you have any of the abovementioned items? What steps have you taken to arrange your affairs? Do you have any tips to add or questions about the above? 

Disclaimer: The information above is solely an opinion based my own personal experience. You do you. I am not a tax and/or financial advisor; nothing in this post should be taken as investment advice. I have no fiduciary responsibility to anyone reading this post. Please consult a financial advisor for investment advice.  For my other posts regarding money, go here. 

A Walk Down Memory Lane

November 2021 was a rough month. I had a falling out with a friend; we don't need to talk about that too much. Also, my grandmother passed away. She had a good life and was 89 years old, but it was a bit sudden. My aunt contacted us to say that my grandma had gone to the hospital with a UTI and shortly after that her organs started to shut down and my aunt was about to put my grandma into hospice. My brother and I got the first redeye we could find and flew to Boston to be there with my aunt and grandma. It is a good thing we did, as she was gone less than 72 hours later. 

She saved a box of journals (I suspect she also threw a lot of them away) and we have been passing them around the family and recently it was my turn to have the box. I had a great time reading them and getting an insight into her life that I had not had before. My grandma and I were not so close that we spoke all the time or saw each other very often (she lived in MA) but she was on Facebook and email and we exchanged messages and notes from time to time. She was an avid reader and we often bonded over what book we were reading. I would probably see her every few years at the very least and we had a great time swimming in her local pond, reading and eating ice cream. 

However, her journals were from the 80s, when she was in her early 50s, my parents were in their late 20s and I was but a girl. At this time in her life she was a manager at a halfway house and her journals reflect the strife that she experienced on a daily basis. She also spent a lot of time in her garden, reading and spending time with friends, often in Maine, which was a special place to her. It is interesting reading about her life not as my grandma, which is what she was to me, but as a woman, a person who did things, a person with stresses etc. 

I especially enjoyed a series of entries that she wrote in 1988 when I went to visit her all by myself that summer. I got to ride on a plane alone and got the wings and everything (PS do parents still do this?) She wrote a lot about the weather, but also about what we did when I was there. 

"Finally, clearing skies so we had our picnic lunch and great swims at the pond, then gardening and a fun evening with games at Lucy's. Kyria spent the night - a bit of a respite for me." (I love the last part.) I have a confession; I have also been known to keep a journal and I have an entry from this same day! "We ate blueberry pancakes for breakfast. Then I read until 9:30 and watched TV until 10:25 (I am pretty sure my grandma only let me watch one hour a day). Then I came into my room and wrote in my diary (I am very factual). I'm going to write some more when I do more things. We went to Aunt Lucy's and had dinner. I stayed the night there and stayed up until eleven. It rained that night but not in the day."  

My 1988 Journal

Here is another from grandma: "Woke to light rain; after lunch we saw Willow at the cinema - great fun! and the cows and calves at Peaceful Meadows (this was a dairy where there was ice cream - one of our favorite spots), ice cream, puzzles, books and Sorry (the board game)." Here is mine on the same day: "Today it was raining so we went to a movie called Willow. It was good." (factual)

Here are a few others from other times that I found fun: "Another wonderful day, painted lawn furniture and cleared up yard. Halcyon (where her brother lived) for herbing and talking and a great steak dinner. Home to Mondale-Reagan debate." Reagan! "Gorgeous day out but 18 degrees. Boys and I all have a touch of the tummy flu - up at 4:30 am! Baked cookies, knit, sewed, played. Nice quiet supper, home at 9 pm. Fine weekend." (funny even though she had the flu, it was a fine weekend). 

As you can see, I have had a very fun time taking a walk down memory lane and even though she probably got rid of some of the more personal or emotional sections or books, I have enjoyed reading more about her day to day life, even though a lot of it, like most of us, is pretty repetitive! 

As I mentioned, I have always kept a journal of sorts. Many times it is just factual as seen above, and usually is a record of my travels more than a daily life kind of thing, but sometimes I record thoughts or feelings. I also (obviously!) have this space, where many of my memories are held. However, this space is full of things that I don't mind being public but I am not really sure how I would feel about someone reading my journals that I am not putting out on the internet. Most likely, many of them would be similar to my grandmother's entries -- the weather, a quick recap of my day, nothing very personal -- but it does make me wonder what may be in them that I would not really want to share. However, when I am gone, does it even matter? My Mom also keeps a journal, which I would want to read when she is gone, but I have a feeling she will not want that (hi Mom!) as it is personal! Hopefully she will leave us a few. 

I will end with a passage from an entry she wrote from Acadia, Maine that I especially enjoyed: "As we eventually settle ourselves and try to organize the boxes, parcels and bags for the trip home tomorrow, we are lifted by a PBS Bernstein concert of Brahms "Violin Concerto!" Could it be played for us in a more entrancing place? The evening is calm, cool and soft. I am replete." 

Do you keep a journal? Would you prefer to get rid of it before anyone else read it? What items do you cherish from your loved ones who are gone?